Abject Misery

I am really trying to understand why some people who are in relationships feel that they have no option but to lead an utterly miserable life and not change it.  Let me explain.  This weekend I was in Brugge in Belgium.  K and I had dinner at Brassiere Raymond (excellent in case you were asking), and beside us sat a couple that reached interesting depths of misery.

I noticed them initially because they were on a table for 4, both sitting on the same side.  Initially I thought that it was so they could sit closer together.  But no, it was so they didn’t actually have to look at each other all evening and could watch others in the restaurant instead.  Both were in their 50’s and both were grossly overweight.  As the evening wore on it was clear that both are trying to eat away their individual unhappiness.  When not eating, he sat with his arms folded resting on a significant stomach and she sat staring at the ceiling (largely).  On the few occasions that they spoke, they didn’t turn towards each other, instead they continued to stare straight in front.  It was as though they believed that if they should look at one another they would turn to stone.

It was an amazing demonstration of pure misery and a resignation that they had completely missed the boat with their lives.  I can never understand why people choose to waste the potential of having a fulfilled happy life, achieving their dreams by settling for early oblivion.


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